When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
